I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

I wasn’t aware that I caught it, it happened to me quite unwittingly. It all started when I logged on to Spotify… Browsing in the music archive there popped up one or other interesting song – however, with [almost] endless resources at my hands, I started browsing into obscure areas; the dark back alleys of music. It was there that I caught it.

It seemed so innocent, just a few songs. And they were kind of catchy. Very folksy, with a nice refrain. Melodic. But little did I know that I would wake up, weeks later, in the middle of night, humming the tune over and over, desperate and hurting; like the scene in “First Blood”, when Rambo finally breaks down in the police house and cries “I can’t get it out of my head… I can’t get the images out of my head”.

The sad part is that I can’t let go of it. Like an alcoholic, or drug abuser, I keep it in my playlists. I come back for it, just another quick fix. It tears my life apart, brings me to tears at night, but I can’t let go.

I’m enclosing the clip below, something as crime scene evidence. Do not push the play button. It will destroy you.

Exhibit A – “Wer Jodeln will”, Die Zillertaler