I had a strange and curious dream last night
I dreamt my heart grew wings and then took flight
Flew far and wide o’er hills and fields of green
Above those golden clouds, to things unseen -
Plucking roses sweet that never grew
And singing childish rhymes all while I flew.
I touched the sky, I think, with outstretched hand
Drew fine-art paintings in the ocean sand
And swiftly sailed across the deep blue sea
To search for wonders named in poetry.

In this dream I had, I know it’s strange
I dreamt I leaped across a mountain range!
The pinnacles where draped in snowy white
And gleaming in the shining sun so bright.
But linger long up there was not for me,
What worlds that lay beyond I had to see.
Quickly went I down the mountain side
T’was there I saw the meadows open wide.

I stood in flowery grass so tall and green
Such wonderful flowers; I had never seen!
The field rolled gently down towards a stream
Beyond which a city seemed to softly gleam.
It was a city made of purest gold
Of its glory every psalm and hymn had told.
At length I stood there, taking in the sight -
Until a voice spoke softly to my right.

The joy I felt I cannot ever tell
Suffice to say, on my knees I quickly fell.
And on my cheeks, round tears then softly broke
As He, my King of Kings, so sweetly spoke.
“This is the home”, He said, “for you I made;”
“Do not fear, the price has all been paid.”
And from His love I then began to weep -
T’was then, that I awoke out of my sleep.

I had a strange and curious dream last night
I dreamt my heart grew wings and then took flight.
The day will come again when I will fly
Beyond those golden clouds in sunset sky.
And nevermore will I this planet roam
For somewhere over there is home, sweet home.

Sånt här tycker jag är kul att stoppa in på t.ex. kundkort i CRM-systemet.

Den här fliken är till för avtalsinformation,
Inställelsetid och åtaganden skulle legat häri.
Men nu har det brustit i vår administration
Och allt som finns är ett stycke poesi!

Man känner sig nästan som Che Guevara.

It was with a pang of sorrow
That I realized today
We may have to say goodbye

We were brothers in arms for so long
You helped me do things
I could never have done on my own.
We built applications, you and I
Hacked together utilities and tools
And the sun was shining.

You never once complained.
Never once faltered.
You had your oddities and quirks
Unappreciated and ridiculed
But you were mine!
And underneath that bland exterior of yours
Was raw power…
The skies were limitless.

I held on to you for as long as I could.
But now you’re slipping through my fingers
And a new group of people will benefit now.

Farewell, my brother,
Remember how I loved you.
Remember the victories we won.

I will never forget.

Se örnen den flyger, högt över land
Svävar i vinden, vid klippornas rand
Sträcker vingar mot solens glans
Fruktar ej något, den vet den är fri.

Som örnen som flyger, så är du fri
Mitt barn, Jag har kallat dig in i min frid
Du behöver ej frukta, Jag är ju här
Jag håller dig nära, Min hand dig bär.

Jag har befriat dig, så sväva i tro
Jag har befriat dig, så vila i ro
För Jag är Jehovah, din mäktige far
Jag håller dig nära, hos dig blir jag kvar.

Jag såg dig bunden, med bojor av järn
Stapplande framåt, med blödande sår
Jag grät och jag kunde väl ej låta bli
Att dö för din synd, och göra dig fri.

Och när stormen kommer, så frukta då ej
När allt kring dig faller, så lita på mig
När klipporna krossas, och marken ej bär
När skyarna rämnar, se, då är Jag där.

Jag har befriat dig, så sväva i tro
Jag har befriat dig, så vila i ro
För Jag är Jehovah, din mäktige far
Jag håller dig nära, hos dig blir jag kvar.

In the end, what good is this
When gone are all the words you wrote
As time itself, with poignant kiss
Through passing years does now demote
When thoughts expressed, so fresh and young
From ink and pen with boldness sprung
Now lies forlorn in a database remote?

What good is it, when that silvery ideal
That in early dawn then shone so bright
And smithed together with utmost zeal
In words of eloquence and grammatical delight
From indexed view now softly slides
As other fancy memes the public guides
From light of day into a distant night?

So seasons come, and seasons go
And fancy words and posts inane
Like falling leaves in wind and snow
Mutedly are left to fade in vain.
Perhaps, a few, or one or two
Did strike a deeper note with you
What more from this to hope to gain?

Thus like thousand snowflakes in the sky
Unique, thoughtful and succinct
Our blogs and thoughts and posts blow by
Some full of wisdom; and some, indistinct
Into this silent world-wide web of thought –
A brilliant backdrop of ideas that’s wrought
From a world of pages interlinked.

Vi har en duva på kontoret här
Som smiter in och ställer till.
En riktigt förslagen duva den är
Som bygga bo under disken vill.

Se, dörren lämnas öppen en liten stund
Och vem tittar då nyfiket in?
Lilla duvan, som vill få en blund
Under mörka, kalla disken sin.

Finns månne här plats för en liten duva?
Finns det rum för det i vår vision?
Som snällt vill lägga sig och ruva
Eller blir det därmed en kulturkollision?

Blir alla då på duvan arga?
Trots att den är så snäll och fin?
Folk ryter och vill lilla duvan sarga
Och slänga den i en högtrycksturbin?

Kanske det är bäst att låta den flyga
Och bygga bo någon annanstans
När vi ej våra känslor kan tygla
Så den inte får nån sportslig chans.

Så stänger vi försiktigt dörren vår
För vi vill nog inte ha något duve-bo
Trots värmen i alla rum och vrår
Bäst ändå att jobba i lugn och ro.

I don’t know what brought it about.

I was sitting at the office, thinking about those little “I Heart” messages that you see from time to time. “I {heart} New York” would probably be the most famous slogan, supposedly. And then I thought, why not make an I-Heart-Generator?

With a gasp and a choke, I realized that the domain name “iheart.se” was still available. And being the administrator of a web hotel, I quickly leaped into action and registered it for myself.

And thus it was born, the I Heart generator.

Mitt webbhotell det rullar på
Och ingen downtime vill jag få
För servrarna tickar lugnt och skönt
Kontrollpanelen lyser grönt.

  Yeah, yeah, ingen kan bli vrång,
  När jag sjunger min webbhotellssång.

På webben kan man surfa runt
Även om det mesta liknar strunt
Men vem bryr sig när allt är fritt
Som delas ut från webbhotellet mitt.

  Yeah, yeah, natten kan bli lång,
  När jag sjunger min webbhotellssång.

När strömmen ryker och allt blir svart
Och ingen annan dator kommer någonvart
Jag njuter då fullt av en vacker sonat
Från mitt fina reservkraftsaggregat.

  Yeah, yeah, alla servrar är igång
  När jag sjunger min webbhotellssång.

(Jag erkänner att jag skrev den här sången för att bli den enda i världen som har en sökträff på ordet “webbhotellssång”.)

Off to a good start, hmm?

Invoicing can be a pain
When it’s just a thing
That you’ve been told to do
And all the numbing mindlessness
Of daily chores done nonetheless
Exciting as the flu
I wish instead for meadows green
And things that I have never seen
And happiness and bluer skies to come
To my computer screen…

Think Simon and Garfunkel and a simple guitar to accompany it. Beautiful. :)

My CEO recently described me as “something as unusual as a technician with a sense for design”.

It flattered me; because I’ve never seen myself as a technician. Although I am a software developer and build computer systems for a living, sort of, there’s a hidden quality that rests within me that perhaps is not immediately obvious to everyone:

Passion!

As calm as I am outside, inside I am a very passionate person. Sometimes I feel like my emotions are so intense, my whole nervous system so sensitive, that I can literally pick apart an orchestral work and step right into it, disassembling the sound as I listen to it and placing the woodwinds, brass and strings around me.

I guess that’s why I like music so much: The strings of my heart quiver when I hear music, like the strings of a violin guided by the touch of a skilled violinist. My soul can soar to unknown heights when it’s in sync with music that’s playing (which is a very good reason why I shouldn’t listen to opera at work, because I won’t get any work done) — and likewise, when trying to concentrate on work and someone else turns on the radio with some mindless beat music, I plunge to the very depths of despair.

Because I’m like that… Passionate.

It becomes a problem when I have to do administration at work. I should have sent out invoices this week; I remind myself every day to do it. (I’m going to do it tomorrow. Really. No, really!) And yet… it’s infinitely more fun to work on the new server; plunging into the depths of system configuration, reading books and FAQ’s, searching for clues and answers. Like a painter, with every stroke of the brush building towards the final picture, I add scripts, config files, download yum packages, step by step ever so carefully completing the server. It’s something I can pour all of my heart into, focusing all my energy upon it and storming this challenge with every intellectual capacity I have.

Yeah, the invoices. Right. Doing administration chores is … about as much fun as assembling parts at a factory. Like telling an artist who just created a beautiful painting, “okay, good, now make fifty of these and we should be about set”. And it’s not that I think less of that type of work (after all, it needs being done!) – it’s just that it’s not how I function.

So I have to motivate myself, find tricks to get things done, and focus, focus. Once I get into it, it usually works out okay, but I squirm and agonize over it for days. Because there’s no passion in it. And that’s why I sometimes pull off great and wonderful feats at work, and in between those moments my productivity can drop to … well, below everyone elses for sure. I usually manage to save the day by being kind of fast at doing things, once I get around to it, but…

I guess that’s why I write poetry about people I fall in love with – because I have to get those stormy feelings out somehow. I pity the woman that one day might fall in love with me… :)

So it’s back to work tomorrow – moving domains, sending out invoices, answering the phone and handling support calls. Chores, administration. Blech. But it needs being done.

But, my, that new server sure looks interesting…